I think way too damn much

Before I start off my blog I really wanted to ask *anyone* who is reading this to please pray for Ryans Grandma who recently passed away. If you guys want to go to his blog A Guy In Love and leave your prayers there if you would like them to be read. Even light a candle and make sure you let it run until it stops. Thats what I did when I heard that his grandma passed. Please pray for ryan and his family.

Now onto my journel entry.

You know when you have those days that you just think way too damn much, well today was my day. I am again reminesing about my future and where the hell it is going. I know I shouldnt seeing as I should just go with the flow but there are soo many things I want to do and I just feel like I am wasting my time not being able to do these things. Like find people to jam with (musically) and make some damn music! Ive always been told I have a very unique voice for a guy (probably because I don't sound like a dude when I am singing) or whatever but I just have a very unique voice. Its just really hard to find people to jam with because most of the people I meet want to be the next rolling stone and they think that it will happen tomarrow and most people dont understand that everything takes time and luck. You can call it star struck I just call it ignorance. Some people just forget what its like to just make music because you love it. My voice in itself is very flexible. I can do anything from rock, pop, and soul. You can say my voice sounds alot like a mixture of Anastacia and Adele.

Writing my book has been slow. Just lately everything seems slow. I don't seem to be getting anywhere in the love department, do I smell or something? Maybe I am not attractive or I look scary... I don't know. In any case I just feel that its going to be awhile for anyone to have the balls and say hi to me. Maybe its me givign off the wrong vibe. I don't know. Maybe guys are just intimidated by my awesomeness lol.

School right now is kinda slow. I really need to take my GED but with the way things are going financially, im just gunna have to wait. Shelving out 70 bucks for something is rather isidious but you gotta do what you gotta do. And then there college. Im really looking into possibly going to the University of Tampa because thats where they have the masters program for library science. And plus its Tampa, ive never been to Tampa. They have another school in Tallahasse but I don't really like being too far away from the beach, ive always loved the water.

Sometimes when I think way too damn much, its the thinking that gets me through the rough.

Love, peace, and plenty of kisses.