Whoe is me
Things have been BUSSAY this past 2 weeks. I feel I have been pushing myself to do things I would not normally do. I have also had time to reflect on myself which I haven't done in a whole while. I guess you can say I have been finding myself abit.
Keeping busy these days is more of a chore for me. If I don't keep busy I get really bored and feel icky. I do not think I have mentioned this but I have been diagnosed with depression since I was about 13. This disorder I have has pretty much altered and destroyed my life. I use to be at a perfect weight, happy mood, and always busy with myself. Hell I even thought I was sexy! And then my hormones kicked in and everything changed. I lost interest in alot of things,people, and myself which inevitably turned me into a hermit/loner. Thank god at 16 I began to restart my life, with the help of someone at the time. I just feel I have lost alot of years of my life and I am ready to take them back.
I have been playing the dating field. After my breakup I feel refreshed and ready to date more guys. Its kind of unnerving sometimes because I never thought of myself as the kind of guy who enjoys talking to random attractive people. I guess when you get older things change. I AM SO READY FOR COLLEGE! I can't wait to get my ged thing... IF IT EVER ARRIVES! I am so going to USF (university of south florida) in Tampa. I just think being on the opposite side of the peninsula will be a great life changing experience for me. Plus, I will be living in the dorms. I am abit flustered because I will be away from my parents. But I just keep on telling myself I have to spread my wings and start my life instead of keeping it on pause.
Like I said before I am really thrilled about the possibility of going to college. Seeing new people, making new friends sounds awesome to me. And not being attached to anyone is an awesome feeling. Why the hell did I decide on starting a relationship this early, experience I guess. Thats the only reason I can think of. But I think doing the whole college life thing will be good for me.
So... I am going to get off here now because ive got lots to do.
Later!
(I can't believe I found this picture...soo wrong lol. Its called welfare barbie!)
Keeping busy these days is more of a chore for me. If I don't keep busy I get really bored and feel icky. I do not think I have mentioned this but I have been diagnosed with depression since I was about 13. This disorder I have has pretty much altered and destroyed my life. I use to be at a perfect weight, happy mood, and always busy with myself. Hell I even thought I was sexy! And then my hormones kicked in and everything changed. I lost interest in alot of things,people, and myself which inevitably turned me into a hermit/loner. Thank god at 16 I began to restart my life, with the help of someone at the time. I just feel I have lost alot of years of my life and I am ready to take them back.
I have been playing the dating field. After my breakup I feel refreshed and ready to date more guys. Its kind of unnerving sometimes because I never thought of myself as the kind of guy who enjoys talking to random attractive people. I guess when you get older things change. I AM SO READY FOR COLLEGE! I can't wait to get my ged thing... IF IT EVER ARRIVES! I am so going to USF (university of south florida) in Tampa. I just think being on the opposite side of the peninsula will be a great life changing experience for me. Plus, I will be living in the dorms. I am abit flustered because I will be away from my parents. But I just keep on telling myself I have to spread my wings and start my life instead of keeping it on pause.
Like I said before I am really thrilled about the possibility of going to college. Seeing new people, making new friends sounds awesome to me. And not being attached to anyone is an awesome feeling. Why the hell did I decide on starting a relationship this early, experience I guess. Thats the only reason I can think of. But I think doing the whole college life thing will be good for me.
So... I am going to get off here now because ive got lots to do.
Later!
(I can't believe I found this picture...soo wrong lol. Its called welfare barbie!)
posted by ÅŽG€£ ©. at
12:19 PM
1 Comments:
Great Post...sounds like you're gaining a lot more confidence. You know, the GLBT community is filled with people who really never had a puberty, so depression isn't uncommon. We weren't allowed to have one because most of us were in the closet during our puberty. I'm going to write a post on this subject soon, and I'm going to go after a few people out there who don't seem to realize this.
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